Happy Holidays, readers (no matter the quantity).
2012 looms, and brings with it an unusually mild winter with surprisingly high temperatures. A turkey feast with a bi-annual meet & greet with some of my family members were par the course for Xmas. The new year is just a couple days away and new classes will become palpable on the ninth of the first month.
I've also made some necessary progress on my current project. It's not a whole lot, but it's a good way to get the ball rolling again. The progress I made includes editing a notably vague few sentences, adding of a chapter to the chapter list (since I felt it didn't describe a desired story element), and completing a subsequent chapter to what I left off.
So with that, I'm signing off. Just hope nobody, for their sake, gets hurt in the celebration of another year's passing.
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Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Saturday, October 22, 2011
FURY, a new story project WITH SNEAK PEEK
Here's what I've been able to produce tonight. It's coming along nicely so far, with no visible errors to be seen (big bonus!). It's a new project I just began. It's a revenge story, and you'll get an idea of what kind of vengeance the main character seeks in this sneak-peek.
The Pride and Joy
Vivien is nine years old, has been for three weeks. Every day is a new one, and I’m always happy that she is there each time. She’s my pride and joy, and I’ll take any bullet or fang that threatens her well-being without hesitation.
What I like to do each birthday is to excite her with something totally new. I still remember her third birthday, where I bit the dust, in terms of finances, and managed to get her four hours of time at a horse ranch outside of town. It was all the worthwhile and it’s been a tradition that I have stood by since then. She’s been called spoiled and I guess there’s some merit to that, but it’s just a token of my appreciation.
That was six years ago, and things have changed only a little. With that in mind, I realized that rather than having the total innocence of a toddler, Vivien has the rambunctiousness of an almost-adolescent, curious and sometimes reckless. But I think my smarts were passed onto her, because she’s proven to be resourceful and thoughtful. The worst she’s experienced in her life has been just a stray nail, which didn’t amount to anything. She knows no true pain, and while it would prepare her for the reality of life to experience such, I won’t force anything on my girl. It’s always better to let your child experience such shaping things on their own, after all.
I was in a fantastic mood yesterday after dinner, and I announced to Clarissa and Vivien, with Vivien bearing the smile I’ve come to know and love, that deserts were in order. We had decadent chocolate sundaes at the finest restaurant in town, each and every one of us. When I tucked her into bed last night, just a few hours later, I heard her call to me as I was just walking out her room, door barely closed.
She felt nervous about something, but she couldn’t describe the reason for it. But I didn’t have to hear her say anything to know why she was nervous; her body was shaking. I know the language of the body fairly well, and her shaking spelled to me that she was in fear. I do know that she’s not afraid of the dark; she’s been past that phase since she was almost eight. So in response to her inability to verify the source of her fears, I reassured her that she would be alright.
That did the trick. She started closing her eyes right away, and to keep assurance still, I walked out of the room at a calm pace. Just as the door was about to shut, I peeked in and noticed that she had fallen asleep. The jewel of my life had lain there, peaceful and motionless.
Today we are going to the meadows, located only a few minutes from the house. We go there most days of the week in the better part of summer, because the temperature is just right and the air is pure, untainted, and perfect for enjoyment. I’m sure she’ll enjoy herself out there today, as she always does.
It turns out that she did. We played a few rounds of ultimate, relaxed on the lush green grass, the soil soft as a bed, and because she brought along the balloons that she got on her birthday, we blew them up and let them fly with the calm winds. There must’ve been as many as thirty of them, all in the sky. I could imagine a fleet of heated balloons embarking on a worldly adventure at that very moment I saw all those balloons. The sun was setting at that time, and we were spent.
As she was eating, she asked me to read her one of the books she received as a gift from Clarissa, just before she would fall asleep. I promised her I would do so; what kind of parent would I be to deny her that?
After a few chapters, she eased into slumber. Today was a great day, looking back on it, and I too took off to sleep. Just as easily, I shut my eyes and, with a few inane thoughts racing through at the pace of a burst of light, began to doze off. This will be a long night.
The Broken Lock
A menacingly slow twist of a safety pin, inserted in the front door, roused only squeaks of steel and wood. At the same moment, the window to Vivien’s room was being hoist open at a rate only a stealthy individual would produce. A figure now stood, hunched, on her window sill. One would only see this person as a shadow in the darkness and the dim moonlight from the outside, but they would still distinguish this figure as being male. Not a particularly tall one, either.
The front door had finally been rested open, but only to remain slightly ajar; this was not the main focus of the two men responsible for these breaches, for the window made entry for both of them. It’s not known why, then, the front door would be unlocked with such effort and left alone.
Both men were, whispering to each other, would have appeared to be murmuring indistinctly from only a few feet away. They were quiet, and methodical. It was obvious that Vivien was in danger.
The man who unlocked the door remained inside the room, just at the foot of Vivien’s bed. The other climbed outside, landed on the lawn below with a quiet thud, and walked towards a car parked at the curb only a stone’s throw away. He produced a sack, leather in composition, of large size.
Meanwhile, as the man was walking back to the house below Vivien’s window, the man in her room began to sweat. But he wasn’t nervous. He was Hector Buchanan, the front-runner, who loved to cause fear and shake things up. The man outside the window was Gillean, the depraved runt, who loved to trap and to maim. He stood there in anticipation, sweating more profusely than Hector was. He was also grinning, eyes wide open. He was embellished with sadistic glee, and this wasn’t the first time he and Hector had done something like this.
Hector, in a rapid movement, turned Vivien onto her stomach; this awoke her, but at the same time, he prevented her from screaming by sealing her mouth with his right hand. With the other, he swept her up out of the safety of her bed, dashed toward the window, and tossed Vivien down to Gillean. The latter’s eyes almost seemed to glow at that very instant.
The Deathly Scream
Vivien screamed. I’ve never heard her utter one like that in my life and I am not going to stall any longer to find out what is happening to her. Children scream like that for a reason.
I broke out in sweat, and Clarissa was also awake at the moment. She immediately clung to my right arm with a vice grip, begging me to check on Vivien. I ran to the closet, put on my comfort clothing, and ran out into the hall.
First thing that caught my attention was that the front door had been opened. I was descending the stairs to investigate when I heard the loud creaking of wood from Vivien’s room. I had no time to waste here, so I went back up the short flight of stairs I travelled with the pace of a rabbit, and found myself trapped behind Vivien’s door, which was locked.
I turned the door knob furiously, begging for a purchase beneath my nerve-wracked breaths. I was finding no such thing, even pushing violently on her door. That was when I could hear Vivien shout to me, but there was something wrong: she was outside. She shouted again, but her voice drowned out mid-note. At that moment, I gave up on her bedroom door and almost leapt down the stairs to the front door. Clarissa was rushing behind me, sounding appropriately distressed.
Right after I threw the door open, I spotted two men fleeing from the house, one was leading the other carrying a sack of some kind. It was writhing around and that was when I deduced that they had placed her in it. They were kidnapping my life, with their path interspersed with an idle car. A shadowy figure was waiting at the driver’s seat.
I screamed her name in rage and pain, pain at the sight of these animals stealing my child away from me like this, while I ran at full speed. The one who wasn’t holding Vivien in the sack turned quickly after hearing me, and threw something at me. At first nothing happened, and while I was still running at full speed towards them, I then felt a jolt of piercing pain in my right calf. It was enough to make me fall to the grass, soaked with morning dew and causing Clarissa just behind me to fall as well.
I was crying at that moment, terrified at what was happening. Both men had been in the car for a second now, and the car began to accelerate. The driver window had been rolled down, and the driver was pointing a gun at me, which I was able to discern because it reflected the moon light. I was getting up, just barely past the knees, when he fired three rounds in quick succession. Neither of them hit, but it was jarring nonetheless.
They were in full speed by then, and there I stood, paralyzed with fear. Some of the houses began to light up, but I was absolutely writhing with something I have never felt before. I fell to my knees, and cried out loud into the night.
I felt the fury of a thousand worlds.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
The Thing Review (2011)(SPOILERS)
There's little imagination to be found here. While it didn't have the huge shoes to fill that a sequel would, it didn't serve much justice as a prequel, either. The audience of the Carpenter original didn't need to be brought up to speed as to the creature's origins; it was established right at the beginning sequence. This review is only intended for others who have watched the film, because it has spoilers.
I had a problem with the in-your-face nature of how the Thing went about its practices. Most daunting was how it was so illogical; it attacked people often when they were surrounded by others, even when armed with weapons it must have realized at a point could kill it in a painful, hot way. It wasn't subtle, it didn't 'scan' the area for vantage points or hiding spots in case it screws up its assimilation attempts (in Carpenter's film, the dog thing goes about the camp, finding out the layout of the place, and listens in on the crew members and finds out how it can go about its activities).
The beginning of the film was better than the ending, even though the ending is
spot-on, faithful to how the canonical sequel began (the man with the slit throat, the split-face corpse, the bloodied axe embedded into the wall, and the block of ice with a large opening are all present). Indeed, the beginning of the film, all 20 or so minutes of it, gives a feeling of some mystery, like, "what is this thing? Where is it from?" However, that is thrown out the window the moment it literally leaps into action and begins its assault on the crew members without a care in the world what happens. Surely the creature would be as weary of foreign lifeforms as the humans are (except for the Sanders character, who was unbelievably naive and should I say, stupid); why would it choose to throw itself into possible danger like that? Oh, that's right, the writers of the film wouldn't have a movie if they gave it more of a dimension than what it ended up having, because they had little imagination.
The characters were virtually card-board cutouts, most of them soulless or lacking of any depth to make them interesting. There was some paranoia development between the characters, I'll give the film this merit, but it didn't have the same feel as the sequel. Plus, why bother being paranoid about people when for little reason, the Thing assimilates someone completely random with no indication as to why, where, or how the person became a victim. I did like this film's own take on the identity test, which relied on, get this, tooth fillings. There actually was some logic to be found in this little plot device, as when it tried to assimilate a person (unsuccessfully I might add), it rejected a metal leg plate during the process because it was inorganic. That's a simple AND clever plot device and it is a plus for the film. However, this is one of the elements of the film that gives it the classification of "remake", seeing as it borrowed many elements from Carpenter's film, as if the design team of the film had nothing else to go on.
Atmosphere is a helpful way to give a film identity, and this film doesn't disappoint, for the most part. It doesn't help that the creature takes no liberties, doesn't seem to hatch any effective plan to take people over, and that even when it goes about its business, there's always people right there to burn it to death. There is a lot of tension during these moments, but the film is chock full of them that it doesn't allow for much ambiance, any breaks from action, which in Carpenter's film were used to great effect thanks to Morricone's stunning soundtrack. While I forgot the name of the person responsible for this film's soundtrack, it was rather forgettable other than the remix of "Humanity" heard at the end sequence, which sounded too much like the original anyway.
CGI was heavily used in this film. It didn't bother me, though, because I've come to accept this method of film effects (except for some cases. 'Deep Blue Sea', I'm looking at you!). Frankly, they were well done, but they didn't have the visceral feel that Rob Bottin's creations from the Carpenter film had. Indeed, many of the mutations were unoriginal or uninspired; Bottin had things like flesh flowers, a huge set of dinosaur-like teeth inside of one's chest, massive deformed-looking claws, a huge skull of what looked like a huge and mean looking dog, and many other things. This Thing almost always had a set of octopus jaws in the chest of the host, and crab-like claws. That's about all that I could say of it because the creature design was decent at best.
In closing, this is a decent film, but it doesn't add anything new to The Thing canon. There was little imagination, it made way too many nods to the Carpenter original, and character development and interaction was, in most cases, nonexistent. And the creature, while still as scary as ever because of its shape-shifting abilities and the way it mutates, is made one-dimensional and somewhat boring. Paranoia is still there, but there's nothing else to speak of. I guess the only real upside to this film is that it'll expose this canon to more people, and might invigorate some interest in it to generate a possible sequel. However, because of the ambiguous nature of the ending of Carpenter's film, it'll be hard to fill such shoes.
I had a problem with the in-your-face nature of how the Thing went about its practices. Most daunting was how it was so illogical; it attacked people often when they were surrounded by others, even when armed with weapons it must have realized at a point could kill it in a painful, hot way. It wasn't subtle, it didn't 'scan' the area for vantage points or hiding spots in case it screws up its assimilation attempts (in Carpenter's film, the dog thing goes about the camp, finding out the layout of the place, and listens in on the crew members and finds out how it can go about its activities).
The beginning of the film was better than the ending, even though the ending is
spot-on, faithful to how the canonical sequel began (the man with the slit throat, the split-face corpse, the bloodied axe embedded into the wall, and the block of ice with a large opening are all present). Indeed, the beginning of the film, all 20 or so minutes of it, gives a feeling of some mystery, like, "what is this thing? Where is it from?" However, that is thrown out the window the moment it literally leaps into action and begins its assault on the crew members without a care in the world what happens. Surely the creature would be as weary of foreign lifeforms as the humans are (except for the Sanders character, who was unbelievably naive and should I say, stupid); why would it choose to throw itself into possible danger like that? Oh, that's right, the writers of the film wouldn't have a movie if they gave it more of a dimension than what it ended up having, because they had little imagination.
The characters were virtually card-board cutouts, most of them soulless or lacking of any depth to make them interesting. There was some paranoia development between the characters, I'll give the film this merit, but it didn't have the same feel as the sequel. Plus, why bother being paranoid about people when for little reason, the Thing assimilates someone completely random with no indication as to why, where, or how the person became a victim. I did like this film's own take on the identity test, which relied on, get this, tooth fillings. There actually was some logic to be found in this little plot device, as when it tried to assimilate a person (unsuccessfully I might add), it rejected a metal leg plate during the process because it was inorganic. That's a simple AND clever plot device and it is a plus for the film. However, this is one of the elements of the film that gives it the classification of "remake", seeing as it borrowed many elements from Carpenter's film, as if the design team of the film had nothing else to go on.
Atmosphere is a helpful way to give a film identity, and this film doesn't disappoint, for the most part. It doesn't help that the creature takes no liberties, doesn't seem to hatch any effective plan to take people over, and that even when it goes about its business, there's always people right there to burn it to death. There is a lot of tension during these moments, but the film is chock full of them that it doesn't allow for much ambiance, any breaks from action, which in Carpenter's film were used to great effect thanks to Morricone's stunning soundtrack. While I forgot the name of the person responsible for this film's soundtrack, it was rather forgettable other than the remix of "Humanity" heard at the end sequence, which sounded too much like the original anyway.
CGI was heavily used in this film. It didn't bother me, though, because I've come to accept this method of film effects (except for some cases. 'Deep Blue Sea', I'm looking at you!). Frankly, they were well done, but they didn't have the visceral feel that Rob Bottin's creations from the Carpenter film had. Indeed, many of the mutations were unoriginal or uninspired; Bottin had things like flesh flowers, a huge set of dinosaur-like teeth inside of one's chest, massive deformed-looking claws, a huge skull of what looked like a huge and mean looking dog, and many other things. This Thing almost always had a set of octopus jaws in the chest of the host, and crab-like claws. That's about all that I could say of it because the creature design was decent at best.
In closing, this is a decent film, but it doesn't add anything new to The Thing canon. There was little imagination, it made way too many nods to the Carpenter original, and character development and interaction was, in most cases, nonexistent. And the creature, while still as scary as ever because of its shape-shifting abilities and the way it mutates, is made one-dimensional and somewhat boring. Paranoia is still there, but there's nothing else to speak of. I guess the only real upside to this film is that it'll expose this canon to more people, and might invigorate some interest in it to generate a possible sequel. However, because of the ambiguous nature of the ending of Carpenter's film, it'll be hard to fill such shoes.
C+
+ Does have some faith to the Carpenter film
+ Retains some of the paranoia you'd think people would feel in such a situation
+ CGI is not bad, but it isn't spectacular, either
+ The beginning gives some sense of wonderment
- Doesn't try anything really new, but does have some twists
- Too many nods to the original
- Monster behavior, and the situations where it attacks, are illogical
- Forgettable soundtrack and the atmosphere is almost nullified by the constant action
- Not as scary as it is gory and intense. In that case, it is more of a sci-fi thriller than a sci-fi horror film.
Additional note: Congrats on the clever identity test method, guys.
Friday, September 9, 2011
Complimentary Photo Art - Acquiring the Means
I don't think I've mentioned it before in this blog, but I've perused the art of photography, albeit in a non-contemporary fashion, so as to compliment my writing. And the one thing I cannot do without in this endeavor would be a camera. Not just any camera you get for fifty to one hundred dollars and that you can fit in your pocket; a Digital SLR camera with the capacity for crisp picture clarity.
It's hard enough to find something of at least decent quality in this niche market. Most of the professional level cameras are jaw-droppingly expensive and at that point, you don't know whether you're overpaying or not for the various models competing for the annihilation of your wallet. Then again, if you go to the bottom of the barrel in terms of price (for which I will have to settle, and it's pragmatic to consider why), you need to keep on the lookout for the features and the undeniable picture quality you look for.
I'm no professional, and I don't romance the idea of taking on a career or anything as a photographer for hire or anything. But, I would like to share my art in some fashion or another. They won't be portraits of people, nor landscape shots. What I will snap will be hard to describe (let's just say it involves theatrical blood, lots of after-shot editing, and even some props), since there are few photographers I've heard of who do what I want to do. What I do know is that I want the camera to take notice of fine details, such as shadows and reflective lighting. Ordinary cameras that saturate the majority of the camera market don't do it the same way an SLR camera does.
There's one camera, within my limited budget (and because I'm patient enough to go with a rather "entry-level" purchase), that I've been looking at with ambition: Fujifilm Finepix S2950
As you can see, it has a decent optical zoom range, which helps because digital zoom isn't nearly as effective; has a good ISO range, which will allow for the camera shot to compensate for any otherwise diminutive effects it would have on the quality of the photograph; a fairly modest 14 megapixels; is capable of 720P HD video capture at 30 FPS, with sound; and a wide angle lens of 28MM.
The possibilities are so real it's almost palpable. Here's to keeping in mind that the camera is one part of the process, as props and even models will be required to make my imagination a reality.
It's hard enough to find something of at least decent quality in this niche market. Most of the professional level cameras are jaw-droppingly expensive and at that point, you don't know whether you're overpaying or not for the various models competing for the annihilation of your wallet. Then again, if you go to the bottom of the barrel in terms of price (for which I will have to settle, and it's pragmatic to consider why), you need to keep on the lookout for the features and the undeniable picture quality you look for.
I'm no professional, and I don't romance the idea of taking on a career or anything as a photographer for hire or anything. But, I would like to share my art in some fashion or another. They won't be portraits of people, nor landscape shots. What I will snap will be hard to describe (let's just say it involves theatrical blood, lots of after-shot editing, and even some props), since there are few photographers I've heard of who do what I want to do. What I do know is that I want the camera to take notice of fine details, such as shadows and reflective lighting. Ordinary cameras that saturate the majority of the camera market don't do it the same way an SLR camera does.
There's one camera, within my limited budget (and because I'm patient enough to go with a rather "entry-level" purchase), that I've been looking at with ambition: Fujifilm Finepix S2950
As you can see, it has a decent optical zoom range, which helps because digital zoom isn't nearly as effective; has a good ISO range, which will allow for the camera shot to compensate for any otherwise diminutive effects it would have on the quality of the photograph; a fairly modest 14 megapixels; is capable of 720P HD video capture at 30 FPS, with sound; and a wide angle lens of 28MM.
The possibilities are so real it's almost palpable. Here's to keeping in mind that the camera is one part of the process, as props and even models will be required to make my imagination a reality.
Monday, August 22, 2011
(Overdue) Purge Completed
Finally, I was beginning to think it would be drawn out forever.
I am late with this post, however, because it's been finished since last Tuesday (August 14th). I submitted it to Clarke's World Magazine and as far as I am aware, it is still pending approval as a submission. In fact, the status of the submission reads as "Under Review." This can take a while, given that the length of the story is at 7,140 words.
I'm hoping that works out, if only to get my name out there and give me an audience.
As for a second story, it will not be a sequel, but a follow-up of sorts. Plus, as soon as I have a half-decent camera at the very least, I will make the photo art. Then, the novella version can really begin. As for the next story, I think I'll begin when I have more free time, perhaps this weekend. Also, it'll be a modification of a prototypical story I wrote last year, but never completed.
Griz out.
I am late with this post, however, because it's been finished since last Tuesday (August 14th). I submitted it to Clarke's World Magazine and as far as I am aware, it is still pending approval as a submission. In fact, the status of the submission reads as "Under Review." This can take a while, given that the length of the story is at 7,140 words.
I'm hoping that works out, if only to get my name out there and give me an audience.
As for a second story, it will not be a sequel, but a follow-up of sorts. Plus, as soon as I have a half-decent camera at the very least, I will make the photo art. Then, the novella version can really begin. As for the next story, I think I'll begin when I have more free time, perhaps this weekend. Also, it'll be a modification of a prototypical story I wrote last year, but never completed.
Griz out.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Purge - Final Edit Stage Update III
This post should be the last that is relevant to this stage of the edit - the stage between getting the work started and getting it published and sent out to the world.
Yesterday, I went through it all the way to the end. I even added another chapter, because I felt that there was a slight lack of continuity. There are over 5,000 words contained in the version of the story that exists at this moment, and depending on the circumstances between now and it's actual finish, it might have approximately 5,500 words.
I am considering the home of some of H.P Lovecraft's short stories to publish; Weird Tales. Failing that, there are some others I can consider. I will not publish to anyone who will try and take ownership of the original story. Besides, publishers like that should be ashamed of themselves for trying to one-over the artists that have made their ascents possible in the first place.
Anyway, in a short-lived bout of distraction, I posted a comment on the latest blog posting which belongs to Shiloh, the girlfriend or whatever of the Youtube user Onision. She's also known as Draculoh. She's a fellow Canadian and is a recording artist. It was on a specific debacle going on between them but that's for neither here or there. This story is 95% done I think, and I am guessing that I'll have it done by the end of next week.
As some British jackass on the aforementioned website likes to close his videos with, Ta-ta.
Yesterday, I went through it all the way to the end. I even added another chapter, because I felt that there was a slight lack of continuity. There are over 5,000 words contained in the version of the story that exists at this moment, and depending on the circumstances between now and it's actual finish, it might have approximately 5,500 words.
I am considering the home of some of H.P Lovecraft's short stories to publish; Weird Tales. Failing that, there are some others I can consider. I will not publish to anyone who will try and take ownership of the original story. Besides, publishers like that should be ashamed of themselves for trying to one-over the artists that have made their ascents possible in the first place.
Anyway, in a short-lived bout of distraction, I posted a comment on the latest blog posting which belongs to Shiloh, the girlfriend or whatever of the Youtube user Onision. She's also known as Draculoh. She's a fellow Canadian and is a recording artist. It was on a specific debacle going on between them but that's for neither here or there. This story is 95% done I think, and I am guessing that I'll have it done by the end of next week.
As some British jackass on the aforementioned website likes to close his videos with, Ta-ta.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Purge - Final Edit Stage Update II
The story once known as "Forget, Regret; Power, Devourer", renamed as 'Purge', is nearing completion.
I made a few more edits today. In the first few chapters, I added a few paragraphs in total to flesh out the story of each. I've also added a space between paragraphs, so as to avoid the "wall of text" effect. Some more corrections had to be made, obviously because Word can't detect every literary mistake. One has to be very intuitive in the editing process.
Feels like I am critiquing my own work, to be frank. And I hold mixed feelings for the realm of critique.
As for publishing it, I am considering Clarke's World Magazine, which is actually what is known as an "e-zine." However, I want to get a full-on copyright before publishing it to them, because I don't want them to own the hard copy version. I'll contact them before hand and inquire about this, but I'll take the safe route anyway because it requires quite a bit of effort to write a story.
Also, they pay ten cents per word (up to 4,000 words), and five cents per word after that. As such, they would prefer a 4,000 word limit. This is definitely encouraging. I could use a monetary boost for sure.
I made a few more edits today. In the first few chapters, I added a few paragraphs in total to flesh out the story of each. I've also added a space between paragraphs, so as to avoid the "wall of text" effect. Some more corrections had to be made, obviously because Word can't detect every literary mistake. One has to be very intuitive in the editing process.
Feels like I am critiquing my own work, to be frank. And I hold mixed feelings for the realm of critique.
As for publishing it, I am considering Clarke's World Magazine, which is actually what is known as an "e-zine." However, I want to get a full-on copyright before publishing it to them, because I don't want them to own the hard copy version. I'll contact them before hand and inquire about this, but I'll take the safe route anyway because it requires quite a bit of effort to write a story.
Also, they pay ten cents per word (up to 4,000 words), and five cents per word after that. As such, they would prefer a 4,000 word limit. This is definitely encouraging. I could use a monetary boost for sure.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
RE: I dont' want a doctor
Click here for the post I am replying to.
I don't buy this.
I do agree, to some extent, that North America's medical establishment is quite flawed and in many cases, is more about shilling for pharmaceutical companies than actually improving your health. However, if you are really going through an episode of dementia, then get something done about it.
Apparently, this was invoked by huge amounts of stress. What could cause such stress? And you argue that you wanted to die happy. Well, are you happy right now? Were you happy before this "episode" rounded its ugly head? I think this is your means of justifying your pessimism towards the medical establishment, and refraining from seeing a doctor. I know you'd be taking a chance, but it's not definite knowledge that they'll inject you with chemicals that come with side-effects. Let alone your assumption that they'll 'experiment' on you somehow, which comes across as misinformed and paranoid.
Frankly, I think the two of you are in a scam. I think this is bullshit, twisted as it is. If you lost 3 years of your life, as young as you are, then how the fuck do you have the mental skill to write blog posts? How the fuck do you remember your blogspot, and the login details?
Attention seems to be your drug, which you share with your boyfriend, obviously (a match made in Heaven, I guess). Believe me, I've seen people sink to unthinkable lows to garner attention, so it wouldn't surprise me if that's all you and Greg are looking for. It's funny how you seem to be rational in your blog posts (as unreasonable as they are), but in the videos Greg has shared with the world, you don't even appear mentally capable of putting together a coherent sentence. And all of this is a bid for the attention you crave, because that's all you feel you have left in your sad little life?
Then again, people like you who try to make the world revolve around you and your problems are hardly ever capable of reprisal. I've met people like you and you all have made me sick with your bullshit, hurting others and whining about it to people acting like a fucking victim. And if my suspicion of this being a total joke is true, then what you ought to do is get the hell off the internet. Before your 'sad' life is really ruined. How would you like to have an encyclopedia dramatica article made about you and your boyfriend's antics? How would you like Anonymous to go after you because you're jerking everyone off with this bullshit?
And seriously, to have such a callous attitude speaks volumes of your character. The video from the channel TJDoesLife is sincere concern, while at the same time he does hold contempt for your asshole attention whore boyfriend. You calling him a prick because he almost entirely got pissed at Greg is telling. I'm not buying this. I am, however, going to tell you one last thing about Greg, since he's the one uploading VIDEOS of this to the world, thus making it everybody's business.
If you really have gone through memory loss, which is a very possible symptom of dementia, Alzheimer's Disease, or a brain tumor, then Greg is an exploitative piece of psychopathic shit.
If you didn't go through what could be early on-set Alzheimer's Disease, memory loss because of dementia, or a symptom of a brain tumor, then Greg is an exploitative piece of psychopathic shit.
See how they both turn out the same? In one scenario, you and he came up with a glaring lie, a grab for attention through an emotionally charged scenario. And in the other, at the behest of your mental health, he chose to exploit you for the world to see so that he can get more views. Why else would he put ADVERTISEMENTS next to the video, hmm?
I don't buy this.
I do agree, to some extent, that North America's medical establishment is quite flawed and in many cases, is more about shilling for pharmaceutical companies than actually improving your health. However, if you are really going through an episode of dementia, then get something done about it.
Apparently, this was invoked by huge amounts of stress. What could cause such stress? And you argue that you wanted to die happy. Well, are you happy right now? Were you happy before this "episode" rounded its ugly head? I think this is your means of justifying your pessimism towards the medical establishment, and refraining from seeing a doctor. I know you'd be taking a chance, but it's not definite knowledge that they'll inject you with chemicals that come with side-effects. Let alone your assumption that they'll 'experiment' on you somehow, which comes across as misinformed and paranoid.
Frankly, I think the two of you are in a scam. I think this is bullshit, twisted as it is. If you lost 3 years of your life, as young as you are, then how the fuck do you have the mental skill to write blog posts? How the fuck do you remember your blogspot, and the login details?
Attention seems to be your drug, which you share with your boyfriend, obviously (a match made in Heaven, I guess). Believe me, I've seen people sink to unthinkable lows to garner attention, so it wouldn't surprise me if that's all you and Greg are looking for. It's funny how you seem to be rational in your blog posts (as unreasonable as they are), but in the videos Greg has shared with the world, you don't even appear mentally capable of putting together a coherent sentence. And all of this is a bid for the attention you crave, because that's all you feel you have left in your sad little life?
Then again, people like you who try to make the world revolve around you and your problems are hardly ever capable of reprisal. I've met people like you and you all have made me sick with your bullshit, hurting others and whining about it to people acting like a fucking victim. And if my suspicion of this being a total joke is true, then what you ought to do is get the hell off the internet. Before your 'sad' life is really ruined. How would you like to have an encyclopedia dramatica article made about you and your boyfriend's antics? How would you like Anonymous to go after you because you're jerking everyone off with this bullshit?
And seriously, to have such a callous attitude speaks volumes of your character. The video from the channel TJDoesLife is sincere concern, while at the same time he does hold contempt for your asshole attention whore boyfriend. You calling him a prick because he almost entirely got pissed at Greg is telling. I'm not buying this. I am, however, going to tell you one last thing about Greg, since he's the one uploading VIDEOS of this to the world, thus making it everybody's business.
If you really have gone through memory loss, which is a very possible symptom of dementia, Alzheimer's Disease, or a brain tumor, then Greg is an exploitative piece of psychopathic shit.
If you didn't go through what could be early on-set Alzheimer's Disease, memory loss because of dementia, or a symptom of a brain tumor, then Greg is an exploitative piece of psychopathic shit.
See how they both turn out the same? In one scenario, you and he came up with a glaring lie, a grab for attention through an emotionally charged scenario. And in the other, at the behest of your mental health, he chose to exploit you for the world to see so that he can get more views. Why else would he put ADVERTISEMENTS next to the video, hmm?
Monday, June 20, 2011
Purge - Final Edit Stage Update
I've gone through the first three parts, editing whatever I deemed necessary, even revising some areas. For good measure, and to help for quick acquisition in my necessary subsequent edits, I've renamed the file to what it is now titled. Since I intend to adapt it into a concept album at some point, whenever that may be, I'm making two versions of it. The musical adaptation would have a few interlude sections of instrumental composition (no vocals).
Also, I'm considering taking thematic, symbolic photographs for this story, to compliment it as a whole. They'd help establish the mood I'm aiming for. I've a fascination, and thus, a predisposition towards symbolic art of various kinds, and that's precisely what these photographs will be. There will be no faces to be seen in any of these photographs.
Also, I'm considering taking thematic, symbolic photographs for this story, to compliment it as a whole. They'd help establish the mood I'm aiming for. I've a fascination, and thus, a predisposition towards symbolic art of various kinds, and that's precisely what these photographs will be. There will be no faces to be seen in any of these photographs.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Purge - Updated logo
This is a newer prototype. Whether I choose to use it or not is still up for debate...in my head!
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Purge
Well, the old title, "Forget, Regret; Power, Devourer" was contrived and convoluted. Enter: Purge.
It's rather simple, but I think it is rather fitting. I think I may stick with this. I created a logo for it. It's a prototype, if you will.
It's rather simple, but I think it is rather fitting. I think I may stick with this. I created a logo for it. It's a prototype, if you will.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Forget, Regret; Power, Devourer (PROGRESS REPORT)
It's been some time since I dedicated any effort to this concept work. I'd like to think that it's due to the open college schedule I have this term, and perhaps I it is correct.
Although I have the entire story written out already (in fact, I've had it completed for over half a year), it needed corrections throughout. Plus, it doesn't hurt to make some revisions, additional plot details, and other such improvements. To play the role of editor, let alone for my own works, is but an arduous task at times. The beast that is the inner argument can overcome any writer!
All ramblings aside, what I've done today included amending typographical errors, adding a paragraph to one of the chapters due to there being a glaringly obvious plot-hole, and a slight change to the title of that same chapter which I worked on. This isn't to say that the changes I made today would be the last before I consider getting this grounded as my intellectual property, but it is a good bit of progress to make.
As for "Victim of Love", that one is on hold. It is still as intriguing as ever, but overcoming my inner conflicts on what direction the story should take, how the characters develop, the style of prose/poetry I utilize to tell the story, and even things I may not be aware of, is an obstruction to my completion of this piece. Let it be known, here and now, that VoL will be finished at some point in the (near?) future.
Plus, I might even change the title of the story of which is the subject of this post. It's an odd one, and I don't think it'd make sense to most people who'd read it.
Although I have the entire story written out already (in fact, I've had it completed for over half a year), it needed corrections throughout. Plus, it doesn't hurt to make some revisions, additional plot details, and other such improvements. To play the role of editor, let alone for my own works, is but an arduous task at times. The beast that is the inner argument can overcome any writer!
All ramblings aside, what I've done today included amending typographical errors, adding a paragraph to one of the chapters due to there being a glaringly obvious plot-hole, and a slight change to the title of that same chapter which I worked on. This isn't to say that the changes I made today would be the last before I consider getting this grounded as my intellectual property, but it is a good bit of progress to make.
As for "Victim of Love", that one is on hold. It is still as intriguing as ever, but overcoming my inner conflicts on what direction the story should take, how the characters develop, the style of prose/poetry I utilize to tell the story, and even things I may not be aware of, is an obstruction to my completion of this piece. Let it be known, here and now, that VoL will be finished at some point in the (near?) future.
Plus, I might even change the title of the story of which is the subject of this post. It's an odd one, and I don't think it'd make sense to most people who'd read it.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Hell After Dreams (Doom mod) Review
I could never imagine the conversion of retardation to the Doom format, but this wad has proven that this is possible. Already scared? Don't be. Be pissed that this classic game has been tainted.
Where does one begin, honestly, after having tortured themselves with this wad? The sense of redemption is always hanging, even when the shit this wad flings at you is overwhelming. It's like I tortured myself for an hour, trudging through the terrifyingly bad levels just to see if I could discover a neat level, or an impressive weapon or enemy. Such things just never greeted my screen.
Instead of a fun, innovative wad with impressive features, this wad is a right mess. Weapons are either overpowered or have no lasting value beyond the first few shots you fire out of curiosity; enemies are a complete joke; the guys who designed this wad were far too fucking fond of intermission screens; and honestly, they don't know how to map properly at all. Let's start with the weapons...
There are just too many, and unlike the compilation wad known as "Aeons of Death", there's no justification for the many weapons you pick up. You only end up using a select few that are abysmally overpowered, to the point of killing the fun factor in the wad. There are two machine-guns on the ninth weapon slot that eradicate every single enemy, save for just one, in mere seconds (don't get me started on the uglier one on that same slot, which feels more like a machine-shotgun on steroids). You get two rocket launcher weapons, though you only need one of them at all. When you pick up most weapons for the first time, they don't even show up; instead, you have to guess which slot the new weapon went to and what the hell it is at all. Some weapons nearly break the game, such as the laser cutter thingamajig which slaughters a Cyberdemon in very little time. I'm just going to skip the rest of this element.
Enemies are lame. There is your summary. As for in-depth detail, I'll give you a bit of that as well. In many maps, you have no reason to fight enemies at all. They're poorly placed, too numerous, some are outright ridiculous in terms of attack power, speed, and health. The first cyberdemon you fight is just around some random corner with absolutely no indication at all, and this is a problem because it's rockets are sped up in this wad. There's a variation of the imp called "werewolves" that dish out insane damage, are fast, and have twice the health of Hell barons. And they're numerous. There's a rocket launcher zombie that, while slow, was seen to handle an enormous barrage of rockets. Then there's the new bosses, ripped straight from two licensed games. They're simply no fun to fight.
And why are there so many fucking intermission screens, guys?! First of all, either learn how to properly communicate in English, or get someone to write them for you, because it was like having to read a kindergartner trying to write a storyline each time these screens appeared. To shorten this part up, though, I will go out on a limb and guess that the number of intermission screens I've seen amounted to over twenty. Shit, and many of them are fucking useless, no thanks to the butchering of my mother tongue and the incoherent "plot."
Map design is abhorrent. They don't know about triggers, there's no logical connections or ideas running through any of them, shit blocks you everywhere, there are solid (and harmless) flame sprites peppering half of the maps in the wad, enemies are often placed in bad spots, ZDoom features are abused ad nauseum, none of the doors locked with keys are indicated accordingly, and textures are (to a lesser extent than this wad's superior predecessor) misaligned. Man, what else can I say? You probably get the point. They have a few novelty ideas here and there, but they're overwhelmed by laughable level design. Shit, there are times that you can't even carry on through a map because they simply don't know anything about the design aspect. One of the levels, called "Sewer", is cursed by a terrible quality death metal track, with horribly integrated vocals. I won't even begin to try to justify that bit.
I'm going to give a non-personal suggestion to "the OutDoomers"; give it a rest, or get a good long bit of practice. Both of you guys yet have a long ways to go before you can make anything redeemable in quality. To break away from that, I'm going to give you an indication as to how mature these guys are. Here's an example of not only their literary "prowess", or lack thereof, but their attitude towards a gaming demographic:
"GAME HAS A STORY LINE
AND ITS VERRY RECOMENDED TO READ ALL TEXT CUT SCENES
SO YOU DONT HAVE TO BITCH LIKE "WHAT IS GOING ON? ITS SO CONFUSING,
WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO? WHERE? TOO WEIRD""
That's from the "H.A.D.2 TIPS and RECOMENDS" text file included with the download. If you do heed this guy's blunt suggestion, then I hope that you don't tear your eyes out each time the "storyline" via the intermissions dot your screen. As I mentioned before, they're typo-ridden messes with no real plot. And might I mention the half-rate dialog implied in some of them? GOD!
Anyway, I would totally avoid this wad. And if they were to ever enact a charge for downloading this, then they'd be committing a crime against humanity. Somehow, the designers managed to make even more of a fucked up wad than with their previous Hell After Dreams incarnation. They have definitely displayed the common happenstance of sequels being worse than originals with Hell After Dreams 2. I am not curious about the upcoming third act at all, now that I've put myself through this one.
I give it a flat 0 out of 10.
Wad created and designed by Redheadmetalc, with DECORATE coding by Thiny93. Includes lots of stolen, non-attributed content.
Where does one begin, honestly, after having tortured themselves with this wad? The sense of redemption is always hanging, even when the shit this wad flings at you is overwhelming. It's like I tortured myself for an hour, trudging through the terrifyingly bad levels just to see if I could discover a neat level, or an impressive weapon or enemy. Such things just never greeted my screen.
Instead of a fun, innovative wad with impressive features, this wad is a right mess. Weapons are either overpowered or have no lasting value beyond the first few shots you fire out of curiosity; enemies are a complete joke; the guys who designed this wad were far too fucking fond of intermission screens; and honestly, they don't know how to map properly at all. Let's start with the weapons...
There are just too many, and unlike the compilation wad known as "Aeons of Death", there's no justification for the many weapons you pick up. You only end up using a select few that are abysmally overpowered, to the point of killing the fun factor in the wad. There are two machine-guns on the ninth weapon slot that eradicate every single enemy, save for just one, in mere seconds (don't get me started on the uglier one on that same slot, which feels more like a machine-shotgun on steroids). You get two rocket launcher weapons, though you only need one of them at all. When you pick up most weapons for the first time, they don't even show up; instead, you have to guess which slot the new weapon went to and what the hell it is at all. Some weapons nearly break the game, such as the laser cutter thingamajig which slaughters a Cyberdemon in very little time. I'm just going to skip the rest of this element.
Enemies are lame. There is your summary. As for in-depth detail, I'll give you a bit of that as well. In many maps, you have no reason to fight enemies at all. They're poorly placed, too numerous, some are outright ridiculous in terms of attack power, speed, and health. The first cyberdemon you fight is just around some random corner with absolutely no indication at all, and this is a problem because it's rockets are sped up in this wad. There's a variation of the imp called "werewolves" that dish out insane damage, are fast, and have twice the health of Hell barons. And they're numerous. There's a rocket launcher zombie that, while slow, was seen to handle an enormous barrage of rockets. Then there's the new bosses, ripped straight from two licensed games. They're simply no fun to fight.
And why are there so many fucking intermission screens, guys?! First of all, either learn how to properly communicate in English, or get someone to write them for you, because it was like having to read a kindergartner trying to write a storyline each time these screens appeared. To shorten this part up, though, I will go out on a limb and guess that the number of intermission screens I've seen amounted to over twenty. Shit, and many of them are fucking useless, no thanks to the butchering of my mother tongue and the incoherent "plot."
Map design is abhorrent. They don't know about triggers, there's no logical connections or ideas running through any of them, shit blocks you everywhere, there are solid (and harmless) flame sprites peppering half of the maps in the wad, enemies are often placed in bad spots, ZDoom features are abused ad nauseum, none of the doors locked with keys are indicated accordingly, and textures are (to a lesser extent than this wad's superior predecessor) misaligned. Man, what else can I say? You probably get the point. They have a few novelty ideas here and there, but they're overwhelmed by laughable level design. Shit, there are times that you can't even carry on through a map because they simply don't know anything about the design aspect. One of the levels, called "Sewer", is cursed by a terrible quality death metal track, with horribly integrated vocals. I won't even begin to try to justify that bit.
I'm going to give a non-personal suggestion to "the OutDoomers"; give it a rest, or get a good long bit of practice. Both of you guys yet have a long ways to go before you can make anything redeemable in quality. To break away from that, I'm going to give you an indication as to how mature these guys are. Here's an example of not only their literary "prowess", or lack thereof, but their attitude towards a gaming demographic:
"GAME HAS A STORY LINE
AND ITS VERRY RECOMENDED TO READ ALL TEXT CUT SCENES
SO YOU DONT HAVE TO BITCH LIKE "WHAT IS GOING ON? ITS SO CONFUSING,
WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO? WHERE? TOO WEIRD""
That's from the "H.A.D.2 TIPS and RECOMENDS" text file included with the download. If you do heed this guy's blunt suggestion, then I hope that you don't tear your eyes out each time the "storyline" via the intermissions dot your screen. As I mentioned before, they're typo-ridden messes with no real plot. And might I mention the half-rate dialog implied in some of them? GOD!
Anyway, I would totally avoid this wad. And if they were to ever enact a charge for downloading this, then they'd be committing a crime against humanity. Somehow, the designers managed to make even more of a fucked up wad than with their previous Hell After Dreams incarnation. They have definitely displayed the common happenstance of sequels being worse than originals with Hell After Dreams 2. I am not curious about the upcoming third act at all, now that I've put myself through this one.
I give it a flat 0 out of 10.
Wad created and designed by Redheadmetalc, with DECORATE coding by Thiny93. Includes lots of stolen, non-attributed content.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
RE: Love is Evil (Long response to TheRationalSkeptic on Youtube)
For those who may be confused, aside from the intended audience of this post, this is directed at a Youtube user called "TheRationalSkeptic." It's directed at his most recent video, as of this writing, called "Love is Evil"; you can view the video here. I posted some comments on his videos using my account called Mythosician06. As you can probably tell already, or if you have read the comments by now, I disagree with him. Wholeheartedly. Anyway, let's get to the point of this post. RS, the segment under the self-made separator is for you.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Elaborated Response to “TheRationalSkeptic”
RE: Love is Evil
You’re not the first person to hold this opinion. But you’re not the first I have come to disagree with on the subject, either. As I’ve said to you before, this is a subjective topic and it varies so wildly from person to person. I’ll have to get into more detail on this later on.
My contention with your argument is because of what you admit within the first minute; that you have no experience with love. Problem is, and it could be to my demerit, that I don’t know what you think love is. This is an important thing to know. But I feel you’re generalizing love far too much with your video. All of what I said in this paragraph represents how I contend with your argument.
What your “love is evil” line of reasoning seems to rely on the most is the selfish element of love. I need to stress to you again: it differs from person to person. I can say that, as I felt what some would consider “love”, I was quite selfless rather than the antithesis of such. I think we can both agree that people can do, to be blunt about it, fucked up things while in love. I’m writing a short story on that premise, after all. But, as a saving grace, people can do magnificent, empowering things while in love as well.
I have a hard time ever agreeing with arguments based on generalizations. It’s why I have a slight issue with the science of psychology, namely in how it categorizes different mindsets and etcetera. From what I perceive, and some may disagree with me, you are using this faulty, often unreliable style of argument. And since the human mind, at the individual level, varies so vastly while maintaining the simplest premises of life (the drive to survive through some, often self-defined “power”), it is unjust to make such a subjective topic so general. There’s nothing of the sort.
Perhaps you’re looking at it philosophically? If so, what philosophy are you basing your “love is evil” argument on? Is it a religious concept of love that you’re deeming to be evil? Or is it a cultural one?
Perhaps, also, you’re looking at it from a more logical, and more objective standpoint; a scientific standpoint. Then where does the “evil” come in? Certainly, the biochemical aspect that produces the emotions revolving around “love”, which to me seems more like attraction than anything else, never concludes that love is malignant. And psychology, as far as I know, doesn’t uniformly make this argument as well. Sigmund Freud may have suggested that in one sense, love can be evil, but in another, it can be good; other psychologists differ from one to another since it is such a subjective topic to discuss.
Why can’t you accept that it is a subjective thing? I can’t stress that enough. It may seem like a talking point by now, but it’s vitally important when it comes to love. What you think of love, I might think of as mere sexual attraction. What I think of love, you may think of as a desire to be a loyal friend. I’ve been hurt, while feeling so strongly for another person, whom, as I told you in your video comments, I saw as my equal, she gave me meaning and as a result, I wanted to be all I could be for her. I still do not think love is evil, having felt it and being hurt while feeling it. And to think that you’d slap the word “evil” in there as if it has any reason to be; that’s where my question that I asked of you in the beginning comes in.
What do you think love is? What does it mean to you?
And why is love “evil” to you? Help me understand just what you think love is, and maybe with that I can understand your use of the word “evil.” The world is not black and white, remember; it is a spectrum of grey shades.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Elaborated Response to “TheRationalSkeptic”
RE: Love is Evil
You’re not the first person to hold this opinion. But you’re not the first I have come to disagree with on the subject, either. As I’ve said to you before, this is a subjective topic and it varies so wildly from person to person. I’ll have to get into more detail on this later on.
My contention with your argument is because of what you admit within the first minute; that you have no experience with love. Problem is, and it could be to my demerit, that I don’t know what you think love is. This is an important thing to know. But I feel you’re generalizing love far too much with your video. All of what I said in this paragraph represents how I contend with your argument.
What your “love is evil” line of reasoning seems to rely on the most is the selfish element of love. I need to stress to you again: it differs from person to person. I can say that, as I felt what some would consider “love”, I was quite selfless rather than the antithesis of such. I think we can both agree that people can do, to be blunt about it, fucked up things while in love. I’m writing a short story on that premise, after all. But, as a saving grace, people can do magnificent, empowering things while in love as well.
I have a hard time ever agreeing with arguments based on generalizations. It’s why I have a slight issue with the science of psychology, namely in how it categorizes different mindsets and etcetera. From what I perceive, and some may disagree with me, you are using this faulty, often unreliable style of argument. And since the human mind, at the individual level, varies so vastly while maintaining the simplest premises of life (the drive to survive through some, often self-defined “power”), it is unjust to make such a subjective topic so general. There’s nothing of the sort.
Perhaps you’re looking at it philosophically? If so, what philosophy are you basing your “love is evil” argument on? Is it a religious concept of love that you’re deeming to be evil? Or is it a cultural one?
Perhaps, also, you’re looking at it from a more logical, and more objective standpoint; a scientific standpoint. Then where does the “evil” come in? Certainly, the biochemical aspect that produces the emotions revolving around “love”, which to me seems more like attraction than anything else, never concludes that love is malignant. And psychology, as far as I know, doesn’t uniformly make this argument as well. Sigmund Freud may have suggested that in one sense, love can be evil, but in another, it can be good; other psychologists differ from one to another since it is such a subjective topic to discuss.
Why can’t you accept that it is a subjective thing? I can’t stress that enough. It may seem like a talking point by now, but it’s vitally important when it comes to love. What you think of love, I might think of as mere sexual attraction. What I think of love, you may think of as a desire to be a loyal friend. I’ve been hurt, while feeling so strongly for another person, whom, as I told you in your video comments, I saw as my equal, she gave me meaning and as a result, I wanted to be all I could be for her. I still do not think love is evil, having felt it and being hurt while feeling it. And to think that you’d slap the word “evil” in there as if it has any reason to be; that’s where my question that I asked of you in the beginning comes in.
What do you think love is? What does it mean to you?
And why is love “evil” to you? Help me understand just what you think love is, and maybe with that I can understand your use of the word “evil.” The world is not black and white, remember; it is a spectrum of grey shades.
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